Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Writer’s Block.

It’s not what you think it is. It’s not where you think it is. It just doesn’t work like you think it does, like it sounds like it ought to.

It’s terrible, that much is true. Claustrophobic, frustrating, stressful, depressing- the works. When it’s there, you feel like it will never end, like you will always have this inability, this ineptitude, to actually write your thoughts down and communicate like a literate, intelligent person.

Here’s the thing.

It’s a mental block, but like I said, it’s not where you think it ought to be. It’s not blocking the words from flowing around in your head. It’s not keeping you from thinking of beautiful adjectives and gloriously structured sentences. I mean, sometimes it does, but usually not. They’re all there, in your head, banging around something awful, creating a racket that you’re surprised can’t be heard outside your mind.

So get this.

How this “block” causes trouble, is by keeping the words from flowing through your fingers. It traps them in your already panicking brain, and mixes them all up and makes a mess, and even though you try as hard as you can, there’s no way to make them sprout from the end of a pen, no way to string them together on the keyboard, and they’re all just… there. Wanting to come out, wanting to trip across the paper, or the screen, wanting to make sense, to reach out and grab people right by the brain lobes and scream “look at this” and mean something to them, and touch their hearts like only the right words can.

But they’re blocked.

Just… drifting little words, and after a while they start to dissipate, fade away into the recesses of your stressed mind, and sometimes a blankness follows. Sometimes the block is stubborn enough that after a while there’s just nothing left. No words, no sentences, eventually no desire. Blankness, and you wonder why you want to be a writer, and you wonder what you were thinking, and you worry that you can’t write well anyways, and you worry that your words never touch anyone, and no one really likes it but maybe they just say they do to be nice and-

Blocked.

Writer’s block screws with your head, no doubt about it. It makes you doubt yourself, lose faith, become depressed, a myriad of things, or if you’re like me it just makes you irrationally angry and restless and more than a little hysterical.

So I’ll finish with a good thing, because there is one.

Writer’s Block doesn’t last.

Let me say that again.

Writer’s. Block. Doesn’t. Last.

Okay? So get that into your head right now and try not to forget it because I promise, I promise, it’s true. And I’m speaking from experience here. It may last days, weeks, maybe only hours, but it will end. It won’t be when you want it to, it won’t be like you expect it to be, but it will be wonderful, and you’ll know it when you see it, trust me.

It will hit suddenly, and you’ll probably be doing something, maybe something important, like sleeping, and you’ll all of a sudden realize that if you don’t have a pen in your hand right now and a paper to word-vomit onto you’re going to spontaneously combust. There’ll be just as many words and ideas in your head as before, when the block was there, but this time they’ll all be clamoring at the entrance, all trying to spill out at once, and your hand won’t be able to keep up with them, but they’ll all come out anyways, all messy and misspelled and beautiful because my gosh you’re writing again and it’s working and it feels so so amazing and there’s nothing quite like it in this whole wide world.

Amazing.

It’s amazing, that’s all there is to it. Impossible for someone who doesn’t write to understand completely, but that’s okay because obviously their talents lie elsewhere, and that’s just fine.

But all you writers out there, just remember, it ends.

Otherwise known as a Chocolate Orange Hazelnut Tart.

DSC_0072Yeah, you read that right. I made it over the holidays, and it was flipping amazing, let me tell you. It didn’t last long enough, as per usual in our household, but it was really amazing with the pumpkin pie liqueur we had…

DSC_0077And since it was the beautiful holidays, I had access to a perfect little setting for my gorgeous tart pictures.

DSC_0080So, what we’re looking at here, is a basic tart crust, a layer of orange custard, a massive layer of orange/chocolate ganache, and finally chopped hazelnuts on top (which unfortunately I forgot to toast before putting on)

DSC_0085But it was amazing anyways. So there. I would make it again in a heartbeat, and really should some day.

This has been another Food Blog.
Peace out, homies.

-A

Oh Beautiful Foods!

Three delightful foods I made over the holidays!

1. Peppermint Muffins w/Fudge Frosting.

DSC_0006I used my trusty muffin recipe, and added a bag of peppermint tea to the batter, then made my favorite fudge frosting. They were delightful.

2. More muffins! What a surprise!

DSC_0050These ones were all lovely orange. Orangey muffins, orangey frosting, they were wonderful. And when you add teeny orange wedges to anything, it automatically becomes better. This is fact.

3. This. THIS. THING. RIGHT. HERE.

DSC_0068Maybe it doesn’t look like much. It was amazing. Gourmet tuna, I guess you could call it. We had just watched a t.v. show about the best sandwiches in the USA, and we were all starving, and all I could think about was sandwiches. And this was born.
I can’t remember all the details, but I know that I mixed canned tuna with some egg, possibly some mayonnaise, sweet onion mustard, parsley, dill, and maybe a couple other things. I then formed it carefully into a patty, and fried it in an already heated cast iron pan with olive oil.
In the meantime, I toasted to pieces of sourdough bread, and mixed up a little spread of mayonnaise, lemon juice, dill, and parsley. I put that goodness on the bread, and melted some cheddar cheese on the tuna patty, and put it all together and OH MY ACTUAL GOODNESS.

It was beautiful. Just… beautiful.

I think I love food too much.

That’s all I have for now.

_DSC0001

Peanut Butter Muffins with Fudge Frosting

Muffins-
1 1/2 cups flour (I used Namaste gluten-free)
1/3 cup natural sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
2 eggs
1/3 cup melted & cooled butter
1/2 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup peanut butter
1/2 cup buttermilk

Frosting-
1/2 stick butter, softened
2 cups powdered sugar
1/4 cup cocoa powder
1/4 cup boiling water

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350, and line or grease standard size muffin tin.

Measure flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt, into a bowl with high sides and whisk to combine. Make a well in the center.

Lightly whisk eggs with butter, vanilla, and peanut butter, then pour the mixture into the well. Evenly distribute the buttermilk around the outside edges of the dry ingredients.

Mix until just incorporated, using your hands or a wooden spoon (gently), and scoop or spoon the batter into the muffin tin. (I have fairly small muffin tins, so making them rather large I ended up with nine muffins.)

Bake for fifteen minutes, rotate the pan, and let go for another ten or so minutes. My oven cooks hot, so I have to watch them carefully. Take note of whether your oven cooks hotter than usual or not, and adjust time accordingly.

In the meantime, mix the powdered sugar and cocoa in a small bowl. Place the butter in the middle, and pour some of the boiling water over it. This will help to melt the butter, and as you stir you can determine how much more water you will need to reach the desired consistency.

Let muffins cool approx. 5 minutes before frosting.

Note: In my experience, muffins made with gluten-free flour tend to take slightly longer to cook.

_DSC0005

_DSC0004
Berry Tea Muffins with Lime Frosting

Muffins-
1 1/2 cups flour (I used Namaste gluten-free)
1/3 cup natural sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 bag berry flavored tea (I used acai berry)
2 eggs
1/3 cup melted & cooled butter
1/2 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup buttermilk

Frosting-
1/2 stick butter, softened
lime juice (I used all the juice from one half a lime)
3/4-1 1/2 cups powdered sugar

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350, and line or grease standard size muffin tin.

Measure flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, salt, and contents of tea bag into a bowl with high sides and whisk to combine. Make a well in the center.

Lightly whisk eggs with butter and vanilla, then pour the mixture into the well. Evenly distribute the buttermilk around the outside edges of the dry ingredients.

Mix until just incorporated, using your hands or a wooden spoon (gently), and scoop or spoon the batter into the muffin tin. (I have fairly small muffin tins, so making them rather large I ended up with nine muffins.)

Bake for fifteen minutes, rotate the pan, and let go for another ten or so minutes. My oven cooks hot, so I have to watch them carefully. Take note of whether your oven cooks hotter than usual or not, and adjust time accordingly.

In the meantime, combine your butter, lime juice, and 3/4 cup powdered sugar in small bowl, stirring with a small spoon until smooth. Continue adding more powdered sugar and juice as needed, or until your frosting is the desired consistency.

Let muffins cool approx. 5 minutes before frosting, and garnish as desired. (I used tiny wedges of lime)

Note: In my experience, muffins made with gluten-free flour tend to take slightly longer to cook.

Also, I suppose any tea that you like would be fabulous, and also any frosting flavor! I definitely plan on experimenting with more combinations in the future.

———

So. Those muffins, let me tell you, were gosh darn delicious. Considering they were purely experimental, I was super impressed with how they turned out, and I would definitely make them again! I am usually not at all a fan of lime anything, but let me tell you, paired with that mild berry tea flavor, it was just superb.

_DSC0012

So I made this awesomeness like…. four or five months ago.

BUT I STILL REMEMBER IT BEING DELICIOUS.

So here we go.DSC_0063
^ It starts with apples ^

I sauteed them with butter, cinnamon, and sucanat until they were soft.

DSC_0064
^ In the meantime slather cream cheese all over your vessel of choice. ^

I used a flour tortilla, which was fine, but other things are better. Whole wheat wraps are nice, but I can bet you dollars to donuts that something homemade would just take the proverbial cake.

DSC_0066
^ Then pile your apples up on that sucker! ^

Make sure to get all the melty buttery bits from the pan too.

DSC_0068
^ Slap it in a cast iron pan that’s already been heated and has some coconut oil in it. ^

DSC_0070
^ Turn it, fry it, put it on a plate, and drizzle the heck out of it with caramel sauce. ^

I used some homemade goat’s milk caramel, otherwise known as cajeta.

(It’s the bomb)

DSC_0073
^ AND THIS ^

This is what you have staring back at you from your plate. Enjoy its presence for a moment.

Then eat it.

DSC_0001

look at us. just, as a people, as a person, as each and every individual. we’re something pretty special, aren’t we?

well no, actually we’re not.

we are disgusting. right down to our very soul-core, we are wrong, and twisted, and disgusting.

the things we do, the things we think, the things we want to do. we are vile. unclean. tainted by sins; lust, greed, envy, anger.

we are disgusting.

and yet.

and yet.
we have been gifted with something unimaginably, indescribably, unfathomably wonderful.

we have been given today.

each and every day we are given, is a gift. mostly we abuse this gift, but it is still there. given freely.

given freely, no less, by someone who loves us so much despite our faults, despite our disgusting hearts, despite our ugliness, that he gave everything so that we might have each and every day.

he gave of himself so freely, so that our cruel, mindless, pointless little existence could have every day.

but the point of that, is so that we could have a point.

we have been given a point, along with our every day. we have been given the greatest reason on heaven and earth to live each day to the fullest, being the beautiful race this gift has transformed us into- if we have let it.

if we have let it, this gift has so completely transformed us from the inside out, that it has cleansed us, washed us of impurities and made us new. made us a people to stand unashamed in the sun, declaring with our beautiful voices the glory of the one who has given us this gift.

so let us shed this ugliness, this disgusting nature, shrugging it off to be no more, and let the glory shine from our new skin.

let us be beautiful.

because every day is a gift, and it is our calling to make that gift a beautiful one.

DSC_0096

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.