Archive for February, 2013


Sunday, February 17th, 2013.

“I don’t know where I am. The setting just… doesn’t matter, maybe. I don’t know. I know there are people there, probably people I am close to, but I don’t even know who. I think we are outside, and I think the sun beats down, but I’m not even aware of it. I’m not even aware of myself. All I know is that he is here. Standing in front of me, and it’s all so strangely vague that I don’t even notice his face… Just… him. And all I do is hold him. Wrap my arms around him and hold on as tight as I can. He is wearing a simple, white t-shirt, that’s been stained and dirtied, because he’s been working. Good, clean, hard work outside. I can feel the soft fabric of the shirt under my fingers, and I can feel the solidness of his chest. I feel his arms wrapped around me, smell his clean, real, scent. I think I tell him that I would like to just hug him forever, and he laughs. I know he says something back, because I can feel it rumble in his chest, that special feeling when a man talks. But I don’t even know what he says. Maybe that’s okay.”

Maybe. I don’t know. There are a lot of things I don’t know right now. Some answers would be okay, I guess, but maybe they’re answers that I really don’t want to hear. Maybe.


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